So Much More Than Just Auto-Fun of the Day :: 3-31-2008

While writing yesterday's Top Ten, I often got stuck spending valuable time going through the multitude of posts I'd already written about my relationship w/this city, and consequently re-working the new post to avoid repeating myself. It took forever and I wasn't happy with the result. Also: every time I trek back into the archives, I'm truly stunned by my capacity for repetition. I wish I had a "Mark as Written" tag on my brain, so I could easily recall what's already been covered.

How consistently I say the same things like they were new things. I've got a common nightmare: I'm relating an anecdote as though it's fresh and exciting while my audience, eyes rolling to skull-backs, suffers through the stale & eager repeat, seething with resentment. Like: on the cruise last summer, Rosie accidentally told the same joke twice in one set, and the experience was to be honest --- jarring. She caught herself, took a drink and apologized, turned it into a new joke, but witnessing the same delivery, made me think -- I do that.

In Ariel Levy's John Waters article, she says any Waters fans would see "his conversation is peppered with reruns and standards ... but it's fine. John Waters's recycling is more interesting than most people's virgin material." Which's something to aspire to.

As a kid, I'd interrupt my Mom if I'd already heard her story: she told me this was rude, as were my corrections. Stephen Dunn, in "The Answers," responds to the question, "why did you leave me?" with "You began to correct my embellishments in public. / You wouldn't let me tell my stories."

Possibly, I've even written about repeating myself before.

There's stories/experiences I already know I tell too often (Olive Garden, life of housewivery/frat rathood, being raised w/o television and artificial coloring, in public high school i wore boxers & skater pants and stared at the ceiling fan a lot, when Matty went to the park to look for osaama and never came back, my ex the cop [what's unfortunate is that I've only got a few exes who I'm certain will never read this, and therefore they're often spoken of/for]), but there's some I don't mean to. Stories about my father I may've told before are the riskiest to re-tell, 'cause no-one wants to interrupt a ghost story. But maybe I don't talk about him as much as I think I do. Which is the problem: I write down so much of what I think, it's nearly impossible to remember what I kept in my head, and what I put into words (therefore changing it immediately).

So, a reader survey! I know, I totally ask so much from you, it's actually semi-obnoxious. But ok -- no need to identify yourself (but you sure can!), and though your comments will be addressed in a larger sense (and possibly specifically, who knows), I don't plan to run down the line in response as I traditionally do. Also; I realize 95% of you won't answer, and that's fine, clearly I took Statistics 350 for a reason, know all about sample size, etc., and also, you don't have to, I appreciate your mysterious eyes. Also if you're my 3-D friend you still have to answer. Feel free to skip one, some or almost all the questions, like if you don't know who Lozo is. Just answer whatever you want.

It's almost time for Auto-Win's SECOND BIRTHDAY! Aren't you excited? Tinkerbell is1

1. How long have you been reading this weirdo's blog? [this weirdo = me]
1/a. Have you read archives?
2. Fill in the blank: "When you're here, you're ______."
3. What's your favorite thing to read on the internet besides me obvs.
4. What's Lozo's favorite position?
5. Have you seen The L Word and if so where is Papi.
6. Name of a blog post title (and, by implication, subject) that'd make your head explode with excitement to read it 'cause it just sounded so good!
7. omg, thanks!
8. Do you think I repeat myself on this blog a lot? Like, in a bad way?
18. anything else? okay.

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quote: "I could say that telling her our story, / was a way of bringing you back to life, / and for a while it was, a memorial / made of memory and its words. / But here's what I knew: /Watching her react, I was sure I'd tell our story again, to others. I understood / how it could be taken to the bank, / and I feared I might not ever again / feel enough to know when to stop." (from Stephen Dunn, "The Stories")

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links:
1) RKB is on Martha Stewart today, Monday March 31st! (@lusty lady)
2) The 10 Most Insane, Child-Warping Moments of '80s Cartoons (for you who watched teevee as a child) (@topless robot)
3) Insightful thoughts on blogging, privacy, sex writing from Sex and The Ivy, as a response to Randall Patterson's NY Times Magazine Article "Chastity Clubs: Virginity" (@sex and the ivy, the ny times)
4) "The deaths of a number of celebrities may well be warnings about the dangers of chronic sleeplessness" : "Can Insomnia Kill?" (@the latimes)
5) "How to Fix Starbucks: "A few helpful suggestions from our panel of coffee geeks and empire builders."
6) A comprehensive list of movies in which poetry takes "center stage": Poetry in Movies (@the michigan quarterly review)
7) Where the "real housewives of NYC" actually really hang out! (@gridskipper)
8) The 101 Most Useful Websites (@telegraph uk)
9) A fantastic 2005 essay from Rick Moody about teaching and learning to write: "Writers and Mentors" (@the atlantic)