Tuesday, August 12, 2008

automatic writing is fun and no day but today, 8-12-08

[Hello! It's me, the sidenote-in-brackets! I'm still waiting for LYING to come in the mail. When it does, all ye auto-gear buyers & contest enter-ers will have your glorious moment. There's still time to order stylish clothing for the whole family.]

So, Peaches closed up. She was a good writer and had a cute ass. Sigh.

Lozo is gonna become a sports blog for a week in September 'cause he's dissatisfied with the best sports blogs lately so he's gonna try to do it himself. Maybe I'll turn Auto-Straddle into a full-fledged After-Ellen/Queerty/Our Chart BUT BETTER blog for a week. I could solicit donations in exchange for earplugs that Haviland once wore in her actual ears. Basically what I'm offering you is a chance to enter the solar system on the tails of a big bright shining star. Take it or leave it.

Actually; that's not such a bad idea. I could persuade my favorite lesbos to write fun things [pay it forward!], and I could see my friends even less than I already do. Okay I just had like 50 ideas at once, I need to take a nap. Or go to sleep. Ha!

Yeondoo Jung's series "Wonderland"
[it features staged photographs from children's drawings.
It's one of the most amazing things I've ever seen, like ... ever.]


insomnia poem #9:

i was playing "swimming pool"
when my computer froze

under the ice, hearts beating still
inspiration's dumb dirt has done its best to
be soil, to rise up. i make my own snacks.
right now it's nuts & dark chocolate in a zip-lock bag,
delicious like sid vicious.
this is the skinny bitch diet.

i don't remember the last time i cried
i used to cry every day.

january '02 i said to jake: "everyone's a couple now.
everyone has a boyfriend or girlfriend now."
including me, including jake, including everyone
like i said everyone everyone everyone is coupled now
and i asked "why is that?"
and jake said: "because of 9-11!"

he got married this year it was in the times
same girl, they wed on a big green farm (it was in the times)
everything like pearly fine wine

crystal always says "whinge" not "whine."
she does this
because of australia.

I like the idea
that complaints have wings,
that they can fly
that they can carry everyone along.

quote: "Life can't be sustained under the pressure of so many eyes. Even as we try to reveal the mystery of ourselves, to catch it unawares, expose its pulse and flinch and peristalsis, the truth has slipped away, burrowed further inside a dark, coiled privacy that replenishes itself like blood. It cannot be seen, much as one might wish to show it. It dies the instant it is touched by light." (from Jennifer Egan, Look At Me)
1. The Lesbian Lifestyle, the website that accidentally gave me second place in the Best Lesbian Blog of the Year Contest (clearly I deserved an A+ or a medal, not a second place), got innovative with their bid for a free copy of our next book club book LYING: A MEMOIR and interviewed Haviland "Chi Chi" Pekor and it's super awesome for serious! Also they got a little redesign over there & it looks hot. Read it! My favorite part is the girl that commented "I had no idea who she was" and the one that said "growl!" To that, I imagine HPS would have only one thing to say: "RAWR." (Will this paragraph last 'til tomorrow? We'll see!) (@the lesbian lifestyle)
2. "Race: The Impossible Conversation" includes Why Obama Isn't Doing Better in the Polls and Talking About Not Talking About Race. (@nymag)
3. I have a lot of questions about this article: Pornography: The Oldest Patron? (@the guardian uk books)
4. Sunday Conversation: "Interview with Weeds star Justin Kirk" (@la times)
5. Sam is doing my fashion icon: The Ronsons as The Royal Tennenbaums (@vanity fair)
6. FriendFeed crawls Twitter, Flickr and YouTube so you don't have to. (@slate)
7. I can't, 'cause I haven't seen Season Two yet, but you can: Watch the Heroes Scenes the Strike Rescued You From (@io9)
8. Statistics reveal: "An African American family with the same income, family size, and other demographics as a white family will spend about 25 percent more of its income on jewelry, cars, personal care, and apparel." A New Theory of the Leisure Class: Inconspicuous Consumption (@the atlantic)
9. Watch this, it's so spot-on, I love it: Cosmopolitan Institute Completes Decades-Long Study on How To Please Your Man (@the onion news)
10. The sad part is that all of these people will fail and the factory will succeed.


Haviland Stillwell said...

In L.A., it isn't Tuesday yet...so not only am I extremely impressed with your prompt posting of auto-fun, but it's also like I'm time-travelling to tomorrow to read it!

And you know how I feel about time travel.

Crystal said...

The insomnia poem has become my favourite reoccuring section of this blog.

You were close: Crystal always says whinge. In Australia we like to say it like we see it.

Vashti said...

6. FriendFeed seems sketchy and super invasive. Then again, it also seems convenient and along the lines of what I already have going with google reader and the facebook newsfeed. BUT. I'm lazy enough on the internet as it is. I don't need anything else "helping" me out.

9. I love The Onion. I'm subscribed to their RSS feed. So why, oh why, did this not show up for me on google reader? I bet FriendFeed knows.

As always, please forgive my rambling. It's 4 in the AM in Chicago. I'm typing with my eyes closed waiting for a download to finish. Good night/morning.

Dave said...

I think it's a great idea. You should do it. Maybe I'll learn a valuable lesson about how hard it is to have a good sports blog, and we'll all gather around my computer, tilt our heads and chuckle as the credits roll like in a 1980s sit-com. Anyway, my point is, you should do it.

Also, your comment on that post had me LMAO this morning. Great work.

a;ex said...

I loved Hav's interview with TLL. To me, she rappresents freedom, equality, and time-travel... and she makes me proud to be a homo.

Also, The Onion video was beyond amazing.

dani said...

haviland is such a star...just like tinkerbell. and just like your poem (get a damn book deal)...and you...obvs.

caitlin said...

if you do that with autostraddle, i'll totally help out, obvs. i have a lot of ideas, i've had a lot of free time. who knew freezepop could freeze your computer!! how exciting. i have been listening to that, run, 23, and you had time on a loop. no wonder i have a lot of feelings. i saw the onion thing on postsecret and fully lol-ed. k that's all.

basia said...

i'm sad i wasn't able to enter the book club contest... i ordered autowin gear about a week too early (my R,PR? shirt came in yesterday just in time for my birthday tomorrow - thanks!) and i don't really have time to read anything else online so i couldn't think of where i could plug FLIRT. i was gonna post a comment at davelozo.com but i heard nobody reads that blog.

loved the HPS interview - many LOLs were had (if LOLs are a thing to be had)

riese said...

haviland stillwell: I'm incredibly impressed with you being number one commenter for the first time since I think 2006? I don't need to tell you how I feel about time travel, clearly it is my favorite thing ever.

Crystal: I feel generally all around my insomnia always delivers for ya', in some format or another. Spelling error ... fixed.

Vashti: FriendFeed is way more than I can handle. It kinda scared me so i didn't look at it too much -- I'm sure I will one of these upcoming sleepless nights. I found that Onion thing on I think ... Jezebel? Or Feministing?

Dave: If I do it, I'll defo do it the same week that you do it, so that then we can be like "Well, I guess we leave this stuff up to the pros!" at the end and do a big exaggerated shrug like "Oh well!"

Also; Thanks, cheif.

A;ex: To me, Haviland rappresents not only laughter but also hard topics like homosexuality and birth, you know? It is unspirational!

dani: Do poets get book deals? I guess fake bad poets do ... like Jewel. I've always wanted to be the next Jewel!

caitlin: If I do it I'm gonna do it the same week as Lozo (september 12th) so you bet yr ass you'll be helping out totally obvs. Also you've got the whole internets on lock down, we can have team meetings all the time.

You kow that "you had time" is one of my favorite songs of all time right? It's like, the best. I mean, it says everything. I've been listening to those things on repeat too, along with the new Amanda Palmer album, Ender, and some moody Scarlett Johanssen. I always have a lot of feelngs.

basia:You can plug Flirt anywhere in the whole webiverse, even Lozo's little blog or facebook or anything. Also, good news about your RPR shirt, I guess it takes things 100 years to get to Canada, omg. HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I'll say happy birthday again tomorrow. Hm.

autumn m said...


eric mathew said...

That Hav interview was real good. The answers were in depth and intense and just plain good.

the onion video was good, i mean nothing i didn't know. the thing is candle wax has to be timed right, you can't just pull it out ya know... it need to be the right moment, or burns could happen.

as for the strawberries, usually they work,, but always check food allergies. for serious.

i want a hip tattoo like michael phelps... like i will never get it... i just want one. i think i would get e=mc2 because those are my initals... kinda cute? or maybe something in hebrew.... i'm not sure.

ow my back hurts. i was pretending to be mimi in rent and was swinging around on a chair.

basia said...

yes, FedEx had issues penetrating the high security of my igloo... and thanks!

ps. i've gone and plugged Flirt on my facebook like the good autowin minion i am

Mercury said...

Those pictures really are totally amazing.

I vote for the insomnia poems too. I like their... unrefined-ness. If that makes sense? Like at IAA there was always 500 thousand drafts of every poem, slight change after slight change, and at the end it had become something else/rubbery. In the beginning they are still raw and have grit. I like them better that way, I think

now watch you tell me that you draft your insomnia poems 501 times... haha

Daev Lozo said...

Hey, it was all my pleasure, Reise.

riese said...

autumn m: what else can i say, you've said it all.

eric mathew: You're always on top of the food allergies, mathew, and that's good. We all have a little back pain every now and again from pretending to be Mimi -- Daphne still does it with finesse, I gotta say. Also always go for the tattoo. I have two, one in biblical hebrew and one in ancient oldschool paleo-phoenician hebrew and I regret not a thing.

basia: good work, minion, good work. We've got no security here, but I'm still waiting for my effin books.

mercury: Thank you for looking at the pictures and commenting on their amazing-ness.

I think editing is sort of a craft, especially when it comes to editing poetry. Like the writing is the art, and editing is the craft, and it's hard to craft nothing. Like none of those poems have a point, or rhyme or reason or any sort of anything, so really, what would i edit? this is just to say / you need not worry / i am not drafting anything 501 times for sure.

daev lozo: nice shoulder!