Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Why Don't We Get Drunk And Go to a Tegan & Sara Concert?

Monday night, Tegan & Sara of the band "Tegan and Sara" played at Webster Hall. Have you heard of them? I talk about them almost every day. They are two cute lesbian girl twins in skinny jeans and Converse shoes with killer musical talent, what more could you ask for in a wife makeout buddy band? Seriously though, their music has gotten me through the past five months of my smokin' hot life, including most notably July and August, which could've been a living hell and often was, but thanks to Haviland, Carly, Spashley, alcohol, and Tegan & Sara, totally weren't.

Okay, show recap starts now. Writing this at NOON: Before the show we had a meeting of Team Awesome at Haviland's house. Team Awesome, FYI, is Carly, Riese and Haviland. It's a little intense to have meetings of Team Awesome because Carly and I talk a lot, and we'd already started drinking. We killed a bottle of wine between the two of us fast. [And that was before the bottle of wine we drank DIRECTLY from the bottle in Haviland's hallway about an hour later, which is how we roll.] Sometimes being around us is like having front row seats to a kickass comedy show and sometimes it's like being around two people who talk too much. Either way, we both have cute haircuts. We discussed all kinds of new fun things that'll be coming this upcoming winter from us for You! at AutoWin and AutoStraddle, like more Vlogs and more posts and more for me, yeah-ah-yeah-ah, and boy briefs. There's so many things, tell all your friends! One of these things is figuring out how to make the content exciting for new readers without repeating myself to the point where it's annoying to long-time readers. That's sort of a problem in my overall life.

Oh also, I've noticed that whenever someone namedrops Autostraddle on Television Without Pity or some such thing (after-ellen, planet boards, qaf livejournal group etc), like someone I don't even know did this weekend, my traffic goes way up. So if you guys ever read message boards or are in various LJ communities discussing relevant topics like lesbian teevee shows or cute bands, feel free to namedrop me every day. Not this post though, that'd be a dead giveaway.


9:31 P.M.: Now I'm really writing about the concert. OMG there's a Tegan and Sara song that talks about Top Tens! It's like it's in the stars. I just posted this blog where I asked y'all to send me songs and you totally all did. I love you. Well, most of you. Some of you i don't know very well and I wouldn't want to rush things.

10:04 P.M.: Okay so we went to this concert. First we had to go to McDonald's so Hav could get fro-yo. She was like, emergency you guys. I got some too, and Carly had fries, and Cait drove, and Stef was there too and then I hung up on Vicky because I couldn't figure out where we were meeting her and I have a very low threshhold for phone conversations. So then we got to Webster Hall and we were in the V.I.P area because we know people who know people, a.k.a. Stef. We had three V.I.P passes but we just swapped 'em out. Stef's strategy.

11:55 P.M.: I just had a good talk with Zoey about Thanksgiving and Phenomenol. Then I had a really good idea, which was to take half an ambien because I felt like drinking an entire Coca Cola at 11:30 was making me a little wound-up. My whole artificial stimulation/sleepification strategy is a little bit rough, I think it needs some work. I just took 1/4th an Adderall to counteract the drowsiness I was feeling from half that Ambien. Sooner or later, I'll reach baseline. And then my brain will go blank suddenly, like a dark room. Maybe I should have a drink. No, that is the last thing I need.

12:10 A.M.: Okay, so these are the important parts about the concert- CONCERT RECAP FOR REAL STARTS HERE

-My BFF Haviland Stillwell, Rising Star and Co-Aspirant and Co-Vlogstar
-My Co-Captain Carly Usdin, co-creator of the world's next great gay sitcom -- I mean -- FIRST great gay sitcom -- "Living it Out"
-My Life-Star Cait, responsible for all kinds of goodness including but not limited to a vehicle that took us to and from the concert (which also served as our escape vehicle last weekend when the three of us were roped into this bizarre Pyramid-Scheme Potluck pitch in my very own living room lead by a fat guy in a ponytail and we had to run away, run very far away and fast.)
-Cruise Director Stef, who gets us into things like concerts and along with semicolon is responsible for the design of and the upcoming redesign of
-Also friends including Vicky and her gay Yose, and Carly's gays Cesar and Matt

VERY IMPORTANT PERSONS: As I said, we were in the VIP area. Guess who else was there? Kim Stolz. We all admired her beauty in a way that was totally sophisticated and mature. Carly especially was a mature normal person, since she works with Kim at MTV-U so it ain't no thang, it was just like, hey what's up, we're all friends here, obvs. Vicky went over and talked to her for a while because Vicky, apparently, will talk to anyone about anything for any length of time ever. She's like got social super-powers. Or not, I guess it depends on how you look at it.

DANCING: I danced around a lot and got really excited when they played good songs. When they played Umbrella, I screamed and freaked out and said "This is the best moment of my life EVER!"

DRINKING: As the night went on, I drank more drinks. Some of these drinks, drank later in the evening, I remember only remotely how I obtained these drinks.

JUMPING: I wanted everyone to jump up and down with me like we were at Kriss Kross concert. Did I succeed? A little. Carly knew the words usually like I did. It's because of her that I listen to Tegan & Sara, she played me all their songs and now I like them. That's what friends do when they aren't doing drugs.

TACKLING: Carly wanted them to play "Living Room" and kept telling me how many orgasms she'd have if they would play it. I thought it'd be really funny if when they started playing "Living Room," if they ever did play "Living Room," for me to tackle Carly to the ground, but in a playful "I'm going to jump on top of you" way. Did I succeed? I think I did. Most people thought it was an accident and worried I'd hurt myself, but to these people I'd like to ask -- what could my "intent" have possibly been when I lept onto Carly from my post high atop the area? Unfortunately I forgot that, unlike me, most people don't have a ridiculously high thresh-hold for pain, let alone find it thrilling. However, Carly's elbows will definitely heal, as will my ankle, which I twisted on the street way later but totally played off so no one knew about it, including me I was mostly drunk enough to forget until I woke up in unbearable pain later and every 20 minutes all night long. Seriously, also, every time I think about this incident, I LOL. Re-reading Carly writing about it just now I LOLed again. I actually LOLed at the gym when it popped into my head again, even though I was reading an article about this woman getting murdered.

FUN! FUN! FUN! : I have a lot of ideas about being Andy Kauffman and about having fun fun fun fun! fun! fun! And maximizing experience. Also, sometimes i just lurk in the corner and whine that I'm ready to go home. Not this time! I was exciting! Excited! I don't remember what songs they played, they were all good ones, they played Nineteen, for sure. It's a good thing I asked Carly to do a write-up for me, because I don't know what to say.

SIDENOTE: Seriously, writing this on half an ambien and 1/4 an adderall is like being really focused on being really light-headed. I don't think there's any conditions I can't write under, I'm a warrior, like Hunter S. Thompson. Fear and Loathing in Planet Harlem. Good thing I'm seeing my psychiatrist in 9 hours. Good thing he doesn't read this. He was in the Village Voice as the best psychopharmacologist, it made me LOL. I can't spell that word and I don't care.

WALKING WITH A GHOST: When they played "Walking with a Ghost," Haviland was like "Oh! I know this song," and we danced a little. Also when we thought they'd left the stage, I screamed "CLOSER TO FINE! play CLOSER TO FINE!" which is an inside joke you may or may not get.

NORTHERN STATE: I also think I danced with someone from Northern State. Stef is down with them. The girls from Northern State are cute, they are really awesome live even though I don't like listening to their CDs as much. They are so cute in their trackpants and sneaks with their raps, you just want to lick them or make out with them in a bathroom or something.

Okay, THIS JUST IN: Carly's recap. Yay! I'm totally done writing mine now.

Here's Carly !:
The night started out like most nights: drinking. Riese and I almost single-handedly drank at least 1 bottle of wine (Stef helped, but I don't really think she made as much of a dent as we did) and then Cait, Haviland, and Stef went to leave and Riese and I were sitting on the floor in the hallway, laughing (again, not out-of-the-ordinary in the least), so I should've known early on that this was going to be a good night.

I know Riese wants me to talk about the performances and about the bands, and I'll get to all of that soon enough, but first I'd like to point out that we got into a shouting match outside of McDonald's (OMG I just remembered that we had McDonald's before the show like, as I was typing that) over whether or not Cait had just driven past us (I WAS RIGHT). Moving on... [SIDENOTE FROM RIESE: She was totally driving a different car than usual, it was white not grey, for one thing.]

Stef is awesome and got all of us into VIP. All of us = 10 people (that's just how we roll). More drinking ensued, we got there just as Northern State was starting. Well, actually first we went to the bathroom, which reeked of incense. Riese thought the bathroom was on fire, but the smoke was just the actual incense burning! Anyway. I have loved Northern State forevs, back when I worked at Urban Outfitters and we got their first CD and Kai and Serena and I were the only people in all of Orlando, FL who liked them, so we played the CD constantly just to piss everyone off, and then this one time we were ringing some stupid boys up and they were like "this music is so awful" and we told them to shut up cause we were -- in fact -- the three ladies of Northern State, and we were really proud of our album. That shut them right up. Anyway, this was my 2nd time seeing them, the first time was a few months ago at their CD release party also with Riese (thanks Stef!). They are so good live, sometimes I think that they are more awesome live than they are on CD. Totally energetic, totally awesome. They played some stuff from all 3 albums, but mostly new stuff (obvs) and they talked about how they met Tegan and Sara and how two of their songs were recently on Grey's Anatomy (which I totally knew and totally told everyone like 20 times, which I'm sure was not annoying at all). Tegan and Sara are on Grey's a lot too, and both bands were featured last week which was rad. Northern State was also in an episode of Damages, but I'm pretty sure that my family and I are the only people on the planet who have seen it. It's really good! And it just got renewed for two seasons! Totally amazing show. Sorry, I'm off-topic. Anyway, Stef and I shouted lyrics at each other, much to everyone's dismay. Then they were done and we drank more.

Then! Tegan and Sara! Yeah! This was also my second time seeing T&S, the first being in Orlando a few years ago. They put on such an amazing show. Lots of adorable stage banter (and I know from adorable stage banter, as my former band -- Sarah and Carly -- was all about adorable stage banter, and we covered T&S's "More For Me"). They are the two cutest people on the entire planet and I want tattoos like theirs. They sounded amazing live and most of the songs they played were from "So Jealous" and "The Con" (I think they played the entire "The Con" album, or at least most of it, can anyone verify this?) Honestly a little bit of it is a blur still, which is a shame, but I had a great effing time. They opened with "Dark Come Soon," which is one of my favorites songs of theirs. Their encore consisted of _________ (does anyone remember what song was first?), then their AMAZING cover of "Umbrella" (apparently they did not play this in Orlando, I have no idea why), and "LIVING ROOM" which is basically my favorite T&S song ever. I kept saying "play Living Room. You guys, they're totally going to end it on Living Room" because my former bandmate Sarah (see above) texted me at the show (after I texted her and said that the show made me miss our old band, obvs) and said that their last song in Orlando was "Living Room," so I had some insider info. So then it came on and I SCREAMED like a schoolgirl and then everything was a blur. What I can piece together was that Riese screamed too, jumped on me and we went crashing to the ground. My head nearly went through a glass table and all of our combined weight landed on my pointy little elbows. So, needless to say, they are totes achy right now. But it was totally amazing, I was so drunk it hardly stung, just a massive rockstar moment.

Anyway. Compared to seeing them a few years ago in Orlando, I think this was just as good. It's hard to say, really, because the show in Orlando was at the Social which is a much smaller venue and I was close to the stage and could see them really well. They completely rocked at this show, and speaking as someone who has been a fan since the "Under Feet Like Ours" / "This Business of Art" days, I am just thrilled to see the transformation that has occurred over the course of their career. They started as a small folk-rock duo and have turned into total effing rockstars, which is completely badass. I fully love them.

Oh! I forgot to mention that ONCE AGAIN, due to the awesomeness of Stef, I got to meet Hesta and Spero of Northern State and Sara of Tegan and Sara. You rock, Stef! There was a lot more that happened, but I'm sure Riese is going to cover it, or we are going to omit it entirely, because we have to leave some things to the imagination, ya know?


Ms. Jackson said...

hey hey...I believe the encore started with "You wouldn't like me",and then went to "Take me anywhere". Or maybe it's the other way around. hmmm

stef said...

this is my favourite post on auto-win ever, because it's about how awesome i am, and also northern state and alcohol. tegan and sara, they were good, you guys. all their lyrics are stolen from post titles on riese's blog, apparently. also the bar, that was good too. i really liked when i yelled at cait that t&s were about to play their encore and cait was like "uh, everybody's leaving" and i was like NO THEY ARE OBVS COMING BACK, DUHHHH (i think i tried to actually bet her $$) but they had already played their encore and i was just drunk. also, carly is a radical female astrological genius, i'll just say this once so you know that i mean this, etc etc.

caitlinmae said...

I just got a contact high from the recap.
Sounds like an absolutely fantastic evening. And Carly- elbows heal, but "Living Room" live is forever.

The Brooklyn Boy said...

I will vouch for both of today's autowinners belief that Northern State is better live than on record. I've seen them twice now - a New Year's show at Southpaw, and then at the Mercury Lounge last May. They just have a lot of fucking fun and great presence and get the room rocking. Also, I totes had a huge crush on Hesta and think I actually swooned when she talked to me for five minutes after the NYE show. If Lozo or Adam got this far, I totally successfully hit on her and we made out in the bathroom. Because I keep it classy.

cait said...

this post is great, cause it's much like what you and carly are like
in real life, talking in tangents, randomly filling in each other's
stories, but also not really explaining anything at all.

i think you failed to mention that you tackled carly while standing on
a table that was probs 2 feet tall, making you almost 8 feet tall,
while she was on the ground standing below you. we were all lucky she
didn't switch to team unconscious cause that would have been super
bad. also, when you hurt your ankle you said something lovely about
lesbians and the baby dykes on the stoop were like, 'she's projecting'
it was amazing, much like the night itself.

Adam said...

People say crazy things to rockstars...after a recent M.I.A. concert a buddy of mine (in a feat of unparalleled idiocy) managed to invite her to McDonalds, to which I think everyone involved said 'lol wut?'

Also, I knew there was a reason I liked B.B. You are a gentleman and a scholar.

Edilma said...

Wow it sounds like you guys had a great time...and you got a pic with Sara (I hate/love you).

"Living Room" is my fav song also :D

I'm gonna have to buy a damn plane ticket and go see them.

Haviland Stillwell said...


also, there is an article about my colleague LEA SALONGA (who we just did a vlog about last week) on

Clearly, y'all, we have our proverbial "fingers" on the pulse of pop culture.


carlytron said...

I know this is usually Riese's thing -- and I'm sure she'll post a comment like this shortly -- but since I wrote a chunk of this blog I think I can write a "response comment" too!

stef: I write my rhymes on the man's dollar, if you're in Times Square come and give me a holler.

caitlinmae: AGREED. It was def. worth it.

brooklyn boy: I have a huge crush on Hesta too.

cait: you're right, we did not explain anything at all. Riese totally tackled me from like 8 feet up. I'm bummed I missed Anklegate.

Haviland: I would say literal fingers, not just proverbial, no?

stef said...

i'm obvs doing a cartoon recap right now.

if you pass me on the street, don't say "what's up honey?"
i'll get kung fu on your ass like it's not even funny.
i'm not that girl, you don't wanna fuck with me.
i'mma get more brutal than the NYPD.

The Brooklyn Boy said...

I love that Hesta's the only emcee to be quoted thus far. She's dope, but I believe Sprout to be the best of the trio; she's more subtle, but the only one of them to regular change up her flow and such.

adam - Good look.

carly - With good reason. The Laminated List competition starts now. I'm totally drafting her first.

basia said...

i'm jealous you got to be drunk for T&S. i saw them last month - they played my town at a church (coz we're just THAT lame that we don't have a bigger venue) so obvs there was no booze or crack dealers (well, technically it is possible that crack dealers were in the house, but if they were, they weren't sellin'). anyway, it was my first (and probably last) sober concert but they were SO amazing that it was actually ok. i don't think i could handle any other concert sober. in fact, i don't think i could handle any other instance of being in a church for that period of time sober.

dewey said...

I want to see T & S soooooo bad!! And like, how jealous am I, you got to meet Sara!! The whole night sounds awesome (or what we know of the night, I feel we are missing lots...??)

I can seriously feel the excitement when reading this and it makes me want to skip everything and arrive at March 5th! (and that would include skipping not only Christmas but my birthday as well)

riese said...

ms.jackson: Either way, I think you're totally right.

stef: I LOLed that all their lyrics were stolen from my post titles. Guess what? I'm going to retire that habit starting now, because it's impossible for me to like, locate old posts quickly because the title is only obliquely referencing the topic. I mean, it makes sense to me but it's not like "oH! that's the one where I was really tired," or whatever.

caitlinmae: In other news, my ankle totally healed.

NOTE TO READERS: the annoying noise just started.

bb: In other news, you said it better than I could've. Also, I wish my name was Hesta. If anyone is still reading this, I made out with her in the bathroom. And then it burned down.

cait: Do you remember what I said about lesbians? They stole that line about projecting from Shane. Trust me, I know from lesbians. Also, Carly's 5'8 (she thinks she's 5'7, but she's wrong) so it worked out better than it could've if I'd jumped on one of many of my 5'5er friends. If she'd become Team Unconscious, then we would've all switched to Team RockStar For Real, like Johnny Depp.

adam: One day, Haviland will be a rockstar, and you can invite her to McDonald's, and she'll be like "LOL LETS GO RIGHT NOW."

edilma: Hop a Plane! Hop a PLannneeeee!!!

Haviland Stillwell: In 1999, I was driving to an elementary school with Zach Wallace in his Honda Accord and he said to me: 'Marie, you will be a successful writer for sure because you have your finger on the pulse of our generation, so to speak,' and I was like 'hot,' and then we went and climbed on the elementary school and jumped off, and now, here we are, in 2007, living the dream, and jumping, which goes to show that hipsters know everything.

Carlytron: Best unpaid intern ever, go-go-gadget comment response obvs. I'd like to insert a joke here about literal fingers, our generation, lesbians, my right red ankle, and music being my hot hot sex, but unfortunately my brain is barely working as I'm blaring T&S to overcome that computer noise thing.

Stef: I don't know what you just said, but I'm pretty sure it rhymed. Be sure to upload those cartoons to the facebook group.

bb: I also made out with Sprout in the bathroom. then it burned down.

basia: Do you remember in TLW when they shot that music video to The Organ in that church and Shane and Carmen made out and it was really hot? And Shane was like "i don't do commitments," or something, and i was like, that is a hot thing to say in front of Jesus. Also, I would recommend the vitamin water trick, you know with putting the likker in the vitamin water, like usually I bring my own drinks anyhow wherevs we go, one time we did that at Nation, but then I had to leave the drink outside on the street but I was like, I will go back and get it afterwards, and this is about to turn into a story that Riese and Carly like to tell even though neither of us remember what happened and we can totally talk forever without making a word of sense or illuminating what happened. I'm pretty sure it did happen though.

riese said...

omg! late addition for dewey--

dewey: We are also missing lots, so our recap is pretty accurate. I mean, we clearly covered the important points--McDonald's, the tackling, etc. I was thinking today that I am so used to listening to T&S constantly that being at the concert was like being at home but louder and with more friends, so I didn't really pay that close attention to what songs were playing, just like how I'm not right now, but also, there's that computer noise thing I mentioned. Yeah, you defo shouldn't skip Xmas or your birthday, because then you couldn't get all the presents.

Lozo said...

i like this. you're working the "why don't we get drunk and" brand into your posts, and you're posting everyday, and you're sorta live-blogging it with times and stuff, and you're drunk and tackling women against their will. you're becoming me.

once you embrace heterosexuality (and my "large" penis) completely, the sky's the limit.

stef said...

dude everything sprout raps is like, the hip hop equivalent of free to be you and me. spero is my favourite cos she's totally the most fun, but hesta has the most chops and her raps are always superior. she's the only one i listen to and actually go 'holy fuck, this girl is SERIOUS.' my favourites include 'i'm timeless / i write while rhyme this / turn down the sound and i'll mime this / edmund hillary couldn't climb this / parsley sage rosemary and thyme this' et al, and also 'and now the jawn is on and i'm a-long long gone, wish i was chillin' like your grandma in boca raton.' you cannot top that. also, i am a really talented rapper in my own right, and there is actual audio proof of this somewhere which will hopefully never see the light of day.

AND cartoons will be done tonight, and uploaded obvs. in the spirit of accuracy, i am dressing cait in an actual where's waldo outfit.

Adam said...


Hav is clearly already a rockstar. Look at her pants.

carlytron said...

stef, in the cartoon, don't forget my jaunty hat (and maybe try to make me look less like stevie wonder than i do in that photo of us with sara).

my fave hesta line: "the country's getting ugly and there's more in store / but don't blame me cause i voted for gore / keep choice legal, your wardrobe regal / chekhov wrote "the seagull," and snoopy is a beagle"

lawlaws said...

Omg omg omg! i am super excited about seeing T&S again in February. Im going to 7! Thats right, 7 gigs!!! Including one in amsterdam. Can't frickin' wait.

I don't know if I told you this story last time I went to see them, but I'm so excited I am excusing myself for repeating.

In August when I went to see them I decided that I wanted to see if there were any other Kelka fans in the crowd. So I shouted 'Nipple Cupcakes' very loudly a few times. And I got a reaction, there were people in the crowd shouting it back.

A couple of days later I was on OurChart reading one of Green's blogs, and someone asked if they heared someone shouting 'Nipple Cupcakes' at the gig.

So I made friends with this girl and we agreed to meet up at the next gig.

Anyway things lead to things, and now she is my super dooper hot girlfriend. So I have to thank Kelka and T&S for me being gooey and in love.

Anyway, I was thinking at the next set of gigs I might see if there were any fellow auto-win readers in the crowd.
What do you think I should shout, something that all your readers would instantly recognise as being a Riese-ism?

Glad you had a wicked time.

asher said...

just shout, "omg, this is hands down totes gonna be amazing, obvs"

or just interupt the banter with 'really tegan, really?'

lawlaws said...

oh i won't be shouting anything at tegan or sara again. not after last time. sara thought i was trying to start a fight in the crowd and stopped the music and had a go at me. after i explained that i was just trying to swap places she said that i should learn how to swap places without being 'aggressive'. oops!

tegan thought i was nice though because she asked the crowd how we were all doing, and i shouted back 'how are you' (i thought it rude not to ask back), and she said thank you for asking.

Still if you listen to the bootleg of the Nottingham gig, you can hear me shouting 'Nipple Cupcakes' at the beginning.

Those were good times.

Crystal said...

I've had Kris Kross' 'Jump' in my head for about three hours now, those guys are so fly. Sounds like a killer night. I've seen them a few times at sxsw, they always talk more than they play, which is fine. Maybe they'll be there next year too.

riese said...

Lozo: Oh, she wanted it.

Stef:I love free to be you and me, I downloaded it from itunes once upon a time, that was really smart.

Carly: Stef, in the cartoon, try to make me look as much like Stevie Wonder as possible.

lawlaws: You did not tell me that story, but it is pure magic. What's really funny is that if it wasn't for Kelka and Slogreen, no one ever would've read my l word recaps, they never would've been picked up by the l word online, and none of us would be here right now, I'd probably never have listened to tegan and sara, and there would be no more flowers, children or bunny rabbits. Also that might be the only love story to ever involve OurChart, albeit in a roundabout way.

Asher: Good call, took the words right out of my mouth, surprise.

Crystal: I had no idea Kriss Kross still existed, I sometimes thought they were a figment of my imagination.

Edilma said...

"nipple cupcakes" hahahahah genius.

Lozo said...

yeah, right. try telling that to a judge. "no means no" and all that. fucking liberals.

asher said...

ps - riese, your request for 'closer to fine' is fucking hilarious.

LMC said...

Aw, yay! Sounds like you guys had an awesome time at the Tegan & Sara concert. Which, I gotta say, I totally started listening to Tegan & Sara like a month before I started reading this blog, and then once I started reading this, I listened to them a lot more because you talk about them so much and it's like talking about chocolate cake... makes me want it. Ahem. That could be the Dilaudid talking.

Anywho, I'm glad you're posting so much! I got back from the hospital last week and have been slowly trying to get back on the interwebs, and I must say all the content here was a pleasant surprise! It made me feel all nutmeggy like Christmas.

Oh, also, love their cover of "Umbrella." Love that song, period. Have you heard the Marie Digby version? That might be my fave ever.

Haviland Stillwell said...

They played "Umbrella" and obvs everyone went nuts. This was also one of the only songs I knew, so it was exciting for me. Ha.

Also, everyone --RIESE HAS NO COMPUTER FOR 3-4 DAYS!

Due to the buzzing sound from Britney's album, she's not going to be around much...

For those of you who don't live in the US, it's Thanksgiving...I have been asked to bring my computer to her place today, so hopefully something will be up, via my vessel.

Just thought you might all like to know that.

Anonymous said...

It would take a long time to explain how i found myself on this blog of yours. and even longer to explain why i am 'commenting' for the first time in my life. basically it is about Damages. I now like you cause you gave a shout out to the best show on television. the best acting on television. So, if you have a face, you should be watching this show. this show called damages. yep, that simple. so you and your family are not the only ones watching it. i am now going to bring this blog up in random conversations.

carlytron said...

Hi. I'm the one who is obsessed with Damages, not Riese. I tried to get her to watch it but she REFUSED. It is an awesome show. My mom and I had a weekly standing date to watch it, we were that obsessed. At Thanksgiving dinner tonight my aunt tried to tell me that it was "contrived," but she also hates The Office and Ugly Betty, so obviously I must question her taste level.

But kudos to you, anonymous fan! Tell all your friends about this blog and I'll make sure to throw in an "Ellen Parsons Project" joke for you (did anyone else think her name was hilarious?).

riese said...

What's up kids? How are you? I'm good, thanks. So I'm on Haviland's computer, as she said my apple has been held hostage. Also I just realised that I didn't actually back up everything, I just thought I did, I hope they don't wipe out my hard drive, whoops. I just imported all my T&S onto Haviland's hard drive from my external hard-drive, these are the kinds of extra special things I do for people I care about, clearly.

1. Thank you, Asher, for understanding the Closer to Fine joke. I've been to A LOT of Indigo Girls concerts, like, it is ridiculous.

2. LMC: What is Diluadid? I've never taken it, but it sounds fun. I'm glad the frequent posts are brightening your recovery and that you like T & S more. I wondered where you were, and I love that cover of Umbrella too obvs.

3. Anonymous: Hi! Carly's the one obsessed with Damages, as she mentions below. Now I'll have to watch it though because you're telling everyone about me. See Carly, bribery is really all you needed to offer. Or you could've just tackled me.

LMC said...

Dilaudid is an opiate-based pain killer with hydromorphone in it... pretty similar to other narcotics. I'm enjoying it. I think I like it better than Vicodin, but not as much as Demerol. It gets rid of the pain pretty well without making you too woozy, but you're still kind of high/happy.

I'm glad you were able to transfer the T&S from your hard drive... hopefully they won't wipe the rest! Who knew Britney would do this to you? I knew she was a mess but I thought she just hated, like, the paps and K-Fed. And she's obvs secretly a lesbian, too. I thought she'd have more solidarity.

Also, today's link to Mindy Kaling's blog? I love that! She's so funny.

Vicky said...

hahaa... i liked this post. Obv(s)iously because it mentioned me. And also helped me to remember the evening. My gay, Jose, who doubles as Yose, has not yet uploaded the pictures to the internet so I'm still waiting to remember the rest. Agreed: it was awesome. I've met T&S THREE times before (they never remember me, either) but I hadn't yet met Kim Stolz - hence, the conversation. I am a bit socially weird - I'm either totally carefree about celebrities (as I said to Y/Jose, "she's just some chick - why not talk to her" about KS) or wanting to suck their celesbian dicks (as I said to Y/Jose, "I want to suck her celesbian dick" about KS). I made up the word celesbian. I think. After I made similar advances on not just Tegan but also Sara and possibly also members of their entourage, Haviland called me "a little starfucker." I think I gave some drunken, lewdly suggestive reply insinuating exactly how I regard her career, despite the strike. Sooorrry about that. haha. Anyways, I also liked Stef's cartoon recaps and wish I had been illustrated. Maybe if I had managed to find you before you hung up on me, I would've made enough of an imprint for the evening.

Le's do eet again.

(I'm trapped upstate for 5 days hence the length and untimeliness of response.)

carlytron said...


My apologies in advance for raining on your proverbial parade but I regret to inform you that you did not invent the word "celesbian."

Proof furnished upon request.


Victoria said...