Friday, September 26, 2008

Friday Looks Good for Auto-Fun

Firstly, thanks to all y'all for the b-day wishes on my last post! I am now 62 and it feels really good, I can't wait to take my limbs to Sandusky and careen towards infinity on the Magnum. If I wanted to express my gratitude via metaphor, I'd compare my emotions to a unicorn galloping through a jasmine aura in Barbados. Then I'd have an ecstatic fit and pass out dramatically, like when Kelly in 90210 OD'ed on speed in the bathroom of the Peach Pit. That happened, right? I'm beginning to wonder if anyone knows what happened. Also; sometimes people write me really amazing emails or facebook messages and I don't write back 'cause I don't know what to say, but I really do apprecaite them, they make me happy. Have I said this before? Probably, as I said I don't really know what happened until now, and now isn't that hard to get a grip on; I'm in Alex's brother's room in Long Island, and there is a giant cardboard cut-out of Johnny Depp in a pirate outfit to my left and a Chicago Bulls decal of some kind at eye level. Maybe I'll write a poem about it one day.

I'm having a lot of anxiety about the election right now, I feel like it's 1998 and I'm waiting to hear back from my Early Decision application. Like is it November yet? I feel like anyone who's on the fence -- after this week, if they're still leaning towards McCain/Palin I don't know what it'd take to change their mind. I mean seriously. I think we need to make "Really Sarah Palin? Really?" t-shirts. Do I even know anyone who's voting for McCain? Please let me know so I can try to change your mind.

I know probs most of you will know what I'm talking about re: Kelly but not know why I'm still talking about David Foster Wallace but I am, 'cause he died, and so I read this tribute on McSweeny's where someone was saying that DFW by his own criteria would've been a success 'cause: "A good writer makes the reader feel less lonely. A good writer makes the reader believe in her own feelings—he assures her (through fiction, no less) that whatever it is she's feeling is True, and not a psychic symptom of being alone." I like that. I want to be like that one day. I miss writing fiction. Maybe I should write a novel and say it's a metaphor of a memoir. I dunno, just an idea.
quote: "Shakespeare describes memory as the warder of the brain, but it is also its courtesan. We all remember the parts of the past that allow us to meet the future. The prototypes of the lie -- white, grievous, practical -- make themselves known when memory is called to answer. Memory usually answers back with bullshit. Everyone likes a good story, especially the one who is telling it, and the historical facts are generally sullied in the process." (David Carr, The Night of the Gun)

1. 50 Amazing Gig Posters Sure to Inspire (@well medicated)
2. Crystal, you must return to America for this one -- American Psycho, the Musical (@ny post pop wrap) and American Psyco heads to the stage (@variety)
3. My Gal (Sarah Palin, obvs) by George Saunders (thanks to green for this one) (@the new yorker)
4. A brief history of Clay Aiken's squirlishness/flat-out lying and thoughtful analysis of his coming out: The Truth Has Outed (@fourfour)
5. David Foster Wallace's Syallabus for a Spring '05 Literary Interpretation Class. Policies include - "Even in a seminar course, it seems a little silly to require participation. Some students [are] cripplingly shy ... on the other hand .. our class can't really function if there isn't student participation -- it will become just me giving a half-assed ad lib lecture for 90 minutes, which (trust me) will be horrible in all kinds of ways." Many footnotes. Required texts include Silence of the Lambs. (@à la sophia)
5a. McSweeny's is running Memories and Tributes of David Foster Wallace (@mcsweenys):
"Among the million other things he did, David Foster Wallace picked out details that were absurd, unlikely, hilarious, and yet, somehow, completely familiar. It was one of his ways of reminding us we are not alone, that we are all in this mess together. It made his stories reassuring and tender and heartbreaking, and it made reading them seem like listening to a friend."
6. The Audacity of Hip-Hop: "Far from being politically alienated and bling-obsessed, the rap generation may be just months away from occupying the White House." Includes video interviews with Redman, Russell Simmons, De La Soul, Rakim, among others. (@newsweek)
7. John Stewart & Steven Colbert - Exclusive Q&A on the 2008 Presidential Elections (@entertainment weekly)
8. MSNBC's Rachel Maddow is "a fresh female face amid cable schoolboys" but is "less a show than an annex ... like Countdown with Keith Olberman" for viewers who are down on Keith Oblerman." (@ny times)
9. Obviously I don't know anything about anything 'cause I don't get what's so amazing about that Spitzer cover, or any New Yorker cover, like, ever. Where's Flaunt or The Virgina Quarterly Review on this list of the nominees for Best Magazine Cover of the year? (@asme)
10. To get to the bottom of this quandry: "The difference between gold-digging and dating someone who just happens to make more money than you — and who pays for your lifestyle — is subtle," the writer actually interviewed other couples on how they handle their income disparity, and it's quite interesting: Am I a Gold-Digger? I asked some friends their opinions. (
11. I've been wondering this too ever since seeing him on The View: Why Bill Clinton is such a lousy surrogate (
12. How Journalists Write (@the guardian uk)
13. Who's gayer, Peppermint Patty or Velma? (@afterellen)
14. If Spike Lee ran Hollywood (
15. Stef told me to watch this and so I did: The Gits ... From 1986 - 1993, The Gits developed an impressive reputation in the Seattle punk scene, only to have its progress halted by the senseless rape & murder of its vocalist, Mia Zapata. This Documentary, directed by Kerri O'Kane chronicles their growth, Mia's murder, and the conviction of her killer. (@pitchfork)
16. OMG!: Susan Powter Needs to Take Her Own Advice: "Remember that crazybird infomercial queen with the giant clothing, grand gestures, peroxide buzz cut and booming baritone? ... she's acquired knowledge of how to use the Internet, which has yielded a virtual warehouse of nonsensical video blogs (or "blog-a-logs," as she...jokes?) in which, for example, Susan goes to town on an organic jasmine popsicle, advertising it as if it were the cure for cancer." (@urlesque)



Crystal said...

Re: American Psycho, I must! I feel like a stage adaptation will be terrible, but there's nothing more I'd love than finding out first hand.

I can only hope that it will be extremely profitable and influence the producers to make musicals of the entire Ellis catalogue, obvs starting with your fav, Less Than Zero. Shall I get you a ticket?

stef said...

i like it when my shared items become auto-fun!

and i'm so happy you watched the gits movie... they were so heartbreakingly fucking good.

also i want to have serious words with you soon about elizabeth wurtzel's article about how she obviously used to fuck dfw. i have been following the coverage and my only response is: of course she did.

A. said...

I'm at work, no time to check out the links before my next cast, but they look super. Will read soon.

This is why I am commenting:

"I think we need to make "Really Sarah Palin? Really?" t-shirts"


Haviland Stillwell said...

these links are SO haviland-geared! love that you shout out to my maddow and my powter...holler to that.

also, for sure, no one knows what happened. has everyone watched "slacker uprising" yet? you should, it's free, and michael moore is, well, a great man. the only thing i'm left wondering is HOW? What actually did happen?

I found about three people so far among my facebook friends who are voting palin/mccain...but lest you worry, i'm working on them...

riese, come to LA. i want to see you. and the a-winners need their vlogs.

Lexi said...

Some people are challenged when it comes to politics. I've been canvassing and doing phone banks for the Obama campaign and the McCain supporters have been pretty goofy. "Yes we are missing half the floor on the porch the roof is falling off and the door is missing the screen...but YAY McCain" Its ridic. Today someone was pretty excited to be supporting Hillary Clinton...

Bren said...

Re: McCain/Palin - Please help me convince my girlfriend’s mother that she is a complete idiot for supporting McCain. On second thought, she isn’t worth the effort as evidenced below.

My girlfriend is currently 1 day into a 4 day trip with her McCain supporting mother, which qualifies as the 9th circle of Hell I think. When I last spoke to her, she had been with her mother for approximately 7.33 hours and her mother had already used the N-word in reference to Obama 4 times. 4 times!! What year is this? What kind of person even has that word in their vocabulary in 2008?

Really, Mitzi? Really?

My feelings are that I should drive the 300 miles and go rescue her.

rod said...

That Sarah Palin article is all levels of hilarity. This election saga is kinda making me wish I was American, so I can be involved and passionate about it. Instead I have to just watch and cheer from the sidelines- like a hockey mom!- rather than getting in there and killing the moose myself. Although, the fun thing about not being American is that I can merrily tell all the Brit kids I teach that Palin is an absolute fruitcake, list the reasons, cite examples, and not get in any trouble. Who says teachers have to be unbiased?
Incidentally, hockey would be far more entertaining if it was played on mooseback. Like polo! on ice.

autumn m said...

ok so im not gonna lie.... i thought about voting for mccain. and i would have voted for bush if i hadnt turn 18 a day late. i read this story once about these people..blah blah blah blah.... and basically it changed my life completely. so now, i support everything that i used to hate, and im probably not voting mccain. i even have a shirt that says, BUSH SUCKS. and another one thats says, F THE PRESIDENT. i get alot of nice comments, and alot of mean looks when i wear them. i must say i would totally wear a Really Sarah Palin? Really? shirt. probabaly everyday. i think i hate her, like i want to punch her in the face. tell me you saw her interview with charlie gibson. WHAT IS THAT?!?!? watching the debate tonight?? im kinda excited about it.

riese said...

crystal: I feel like it could be really dark and fantastic if it has the right music. Then again it could be terrible, there was a musical of Bright Lights Big City that didn't do anyone any favours. I can't imagine how great a Less than Zero musical would be, I imagine it would involve a lot of dark, slow emo ballads.

stef: I love it when I watch a movie about a band that's allegedly the best band of all time that I've never heard of. I feel like I am in the dark about so many things and need to become educated.

I feel like the fact that dfw hooked up with ew is sort of terrificly cute, like he wasn't an elitist, he could still see that underneath all the neon book covers, ew is just a girl standing in front of a manic depressive and asking him to love her.

a. Alex and I need to quit our jobs and get a screen press. We're working on it.

haviland: I know, it's 'cause all I can think about is the g-dforsaken election. I haven't seen Slacker Uprising but obviously Michael Moore as you know has been my hero since before anyone else ever heard from him. Fly me to LA, movie star, i miss you and my bank is empty. I love you! Also I think I met a McCain voter about an hour ago, I'm still getting over it. "I don't talk politics" = "I'm an asshole."

lexi: Well you know it's a good thing they have that porch, that's where they can keep all the kids they aren't aborting.

bren: I would not be able to handle that I think I would divorce my mother. I am hoping that all the black people who are coming out to vote for the first time (I'm not saying this to be racist but 'cause it's actually true) will even out all the racist people who aren't voting for obama 'cause he's a um, whatever word they're using these days.

Also, kinda amzing that her name is Mitzi.

rod: I wish you were American too so that we could have another vote for Obama. If Palin was a Moose-Hockey-Polo Mom, I'd like her better. But I still wouldn't want her to be vice president. I think all the Brits will be laughing their asses off at our ridiculousness if we manage to elect this ridiculous woman.

autumn m: Autumn remember when I tod you about how you would like the 'zine, and then you got one, and you totally like it? You're going to have to trust me about Obama. No but for real, I know you live in Kansas and I believe you like Jesus (according to your facebook profile), but I am genuinely curious why you thought about voting McCain. I want to understand, seriously. And if it is for religious reasons -- or if you know people who are voting for religious reasons -- how do they feel about the seperation of church and state, like do they feel that it's okay to impose Christian values on an allegedly non-theocracy?

Also your t-shirt sounds amazing, way to stand up !

tess said...

i just wanted to share part of a conversation i had with a client today, it's a real winner.

me:"who ya gonna vote for?"


me:"WHAT!!! Why???"

him:"i've had wet dreams about beauty queens who hunt, gut, and serve up their kill. if i can't have her as my wife, i'll take her as my vp."

my father:"huh, that's a good point."

i had no words.

Bokolis said...

Sorry I missed the party...happy b'day. You should go back to being 26. I've been 26 for almost 3 years...happy days!

Peppermint Patty, no question. After she'd have a few in her, Velma was known to...wait...

Entertainers showing their support as they do backfires, as it only makes their choice seem like the fantasyland choice.

Since Ol' Dirty Bastard won't be endorsing anyone, I'm going to vote for myself, as I've always done...unless you run, that is.

My prediction: you'll have to wait a little for change. If Obama gets in position to win- he is increasingly coming off as the better choice- be prepared for the mother of all October surprises.

autumn m said...

i guess so now i have to be totally completely honest. crap, here goes. in high school i was one of those creepy scary religious people, who all they talked about was jesus, and they incorporated that into everything they did. i hated everything i thought was not "biblical". i mean i HATED it. then i went to college, a christian college. where i learned stuff. after college i wasnt so crazy. then i read a story, about a gay couple, and there depravity of human rights. it pissed me off. so i completely changed who i was. because i realized i was a hypocritical self righteous jerk who had no right to hate and judge others for what they did or believed. basically you know those people who throw stuff at people who march in gay pride parades, even though i never did that, i would have. im not proud of it. and because i was one of those religious freaks, i would have voted republican. ask any christian and the reason they will give you is they dont believe in abortion, or homosexuality. thats it. those two reasons. i thought of voting for mccain because of what i used to be, how i used to see the world. complete change takes time. have no fear though, its obama all the way for me. and i do have my beliefs, but i have never used it here, or agianst anyone here. nor will i ever. i do attend a church once every so often, but it is for my personnel values, not to comform the world. i dont force anything on anyone. and if i hear people talking about wanting to do so, i defend the right or the other people, like i would my own. my religious friends know my standings on these things, and dont approve, thats why we dont talk politcs or crap like that. and they hate my anti-republican shirts with passion. this is long. i hope this makes sense.

A. said...

So printing press this week then yes? I'm all for the idea of you and Semi forming the auto-win sweatshop. You can also hand sew soccer balls on the weekends.

A. said...

(... and a screen press)

And while you're at it, some knock off handbags.

emb said...

I watched the debate last night, and when the topic was Iraq/Afghanistan, I thought Obama accused McCain of trying to "model through" Afghanistan. I thought: OMG!! Then I realized he said "muddle through." Bummer.

I agree with Haviland... I miss the vlogs.

Haviland Stillwell said...

re: "modeling through" -- i absolutely was bb messenging Riese throughout, saying "did Obama just suggest modeling through?" Glad we were all on the same page.

Anonymous said...

i so hate 1998 right now....

riese said...

tess: That's so gross! I think you should ask the client if he would change his mind if you got him a prostitute who looks like sarah palin, and then do it. I mean, unless you are a prostitute, and that's what you mean by client, in which case you should grab him by the balls and give him an offer he can't refuse. Also if she's the VP, she's still not gonna bang him. I mean, that logic is faulty in so many ways obvs.

bokolis: Good call. I've pretty much already decided I prefer 26, thus the banner is staying as it is. I hope you're Obama, so that you can vote for Obama. I liked the dude that said he wasn't going to vote for anyone 'cause last time he voted for Gore and Bush decided to win the election anyhow, even though he lost it, and he found that discouraging.

autumn: I think that's awesome. I think what boggles my mind is that people are more concerned about imposing religious values (pro-life, anti-homosexual rights) upon an allegedly non-relgious government than about the social domestic policies that could really change their lives. But it gives me hope that there are people like you who are open to new ideas and open to change your mind. Keep on fighting the good fight and wearing your t-shirts.

a. I like the idea of hand-sewing. I really have a desire to get back to the earth and the crafts, I want to sew shirts. I also am a big sweater, like I sweat alot. So that's another thing I've got going for us. We're all about the totesbags.

emb and haviland stillwell: i thought the same thing, that was the mis-hear mis-heard around the world, vega was like, omg did he just say model through it? and i was like, NO muddle through it, but, I'd have to say that Tyra would've toally pointed out that she modeled through it and still got a really good photo where she was smiling with her eyes, just saying.

anonymous: and at the same time, i miss 1998, when i was still full of hope.

a;ex said...

I'm days late on this, but I second what Riese said: Autumn, you give me hope about life, love, and this country.