Friday, September 12, 2008

i've seen the worst of you too: auto fun of the day 9.12.2008

[david bicho]

quote: "the greatest lie of all is the feeling of firmness beneath our feet. we are at our most honest when we are lost." (kierkegaard)
links: [I think every time I do auto-fun, I will personally implore you to read one of these links regardless of how you think you might feel about it. this time, it's number 7.]
1. mostly i am excited to hear about the heartbreak and hardships: tila tequila don't work right. (@fourfour)
2. "There is no negotiating with insomnia — you are at the mercy of your brain’s whims, like a pregnant vegetarian who finds herself eating slices of bologna slathered in jam": jessica cutler'strouble sleeping? read insomniac. (@the smart set)
3. holler j-beals: top ten sex scenes involving food (
4. the sixty-day war: with one hastily made decision, john mccain upended the presidential race. an investigation of the bloody new political realities. (@nymag)
5. i knew it! talking is good; too much talking may not be: adolescent girls are totally talking like way too much -- "the term researchers use is “co-rumination” to describe frequently or obsessively discussing the same problem ... it has intensified significantly with e-mail, text messaging, instant messaging and Facebook. And in certain cases it can spin into a potentially contagious and unhealthy emotional angst, experts say." (@nytimes)
6. i didn't actually read this, but adam, maybe you will: over my dead body (@n+1)
7. i will forever remain faithful: how lil wayne helped me survive my first year teaching new orleans (@oxford american)
8. re: dream house ... decorating with books. (a bunch of links @bookslut)
9. fragments from palin! the musical (@mcsweeny's)
10. what makes people vote Republican? (@the edge)
11. the many faces of sarah palin! including the vlog! (@wired)
insomnia poem #13

remember when i used to sit alone
in my room all night
i mean it i could write and write
riding a spaceship of dark cave and starlight

the first rule of autowin club is
don't talk about bliss or
you'll knock it right over.

the second rule is
alone is the new multiplication
see: it's more, not less.
double the me, double the auto-fun
girl why don't you run

i used to like going to sleep before you
and waking up to hear about what i'd written
the night before
like maybe you'd read it
before i did
like you knew about me
before i knew about me
like time travel, which i love
and also doves
seem like nice birds

speaking of birds when i was a kid
i'd make lewis play pretend with me
we were birds, our nest a trampoline
you know
a place to feed and sleep and care
and by that i mean
a place to bounce
a place to flounce
a place to fly

what i mean is
i think i confused
with jumping



Adam said...

I tried. I really did.

I'll say one thing for (pseudonymous?) Mark Greif: he can hold an erection for 1500 words.

Vashti said...

Thank you for posting the wired article. I saw Sara Benincasa link to it on her blog earlier but I forgot about it. I'm one of those people who watches/reads anything regarding Palin [and I guess McCain too] just so I have more reason to be angry at her and the GOP. I think I secretly enjoy having my mind explode.
Did you watch her interview with Charlie Gibson?

I liked the Lil Wayne piece.

I also like the Kierkegaard quote. I was going to say how, for the most part, I really like his philosophy and then insert one of his quotes about passion or something. So I started searching for a quote and ended up reading part of "The Journals of Kierkegaard" and now I have no idea what point I'm trying to make in this comment. But thanks for quoting him because I do enjoy his writing and that quote is fantastic.

autumn m said...

that lil wayne piece was good. and the many faces of sara palin was funny. i agree totally with what vashti said about reading up on it, just so you get really pissed. i get. OH!!!!! i thought maybe i would share my good news with you, i totally got two raises today. thats right TWO!!! it totally freakin rocks. it made me happy, so now you have to be happy to. woo hoo for more money!!!

a;ex said...

This is so weird... I actually know and sort of understand why some people vote Republican. What?

ooo an insomnia poem! Any chance this will appear in a FUTURE ISSUE OF THE AUTO-ZINE?! zomg!

Anonymous said...

Re #5:

Actual conclusion = all lesbians are secretly 13 years old? Or am I reading between the lines too much? [Straight girls are succeeding in killing perfectly good relationships through relentless over-analysis now? I thought we had the market on that cornered!]

riese said...

adam: I tried too. I really did. I mean for like two sentences. but that was nice, what you did there.

vashti: I know I love the present liberal obsession with Palin. like we're so appalled by her existence we just can't stop.

I got the Kierkegaard quote from LYING, I'm not gonna lie.

autumn: OMG, now that you've gotten two raises you'll have money for beer, snacks and auto-'zines! I hope you've gotten yours in the mail now. If you haven't, holler at me. I'm glad to hear from a democrat in a red state. omg.

a;ex: tinkerbell wants to eat a koala bear right now.

sivi: i found that i moved seamlessly from adolescence of talking about boys with uncanny obsession, fever, dedication, etc. and just when i got too old to keep literally waiting by the phone with my friends willing it to call, i switched teams, and kept on having feelings. yay!