Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Tuesday You See, She Had to be Free, but Somehow I've Got to Carry On

TOP TEN REASONS I DIDN'T DO A SUNDAY TOP TEN
(While we're on the topic of "things I didn't do," I'd also like to mention that I also did not write the 15 e-mails I owe various people that I love/want to love/gave birth to me, write a book proposal, return phone calls, be responsible, do laundry)


10.That Moving Thing. That No-Phone Thing. Followed by that Last-Minute-Decision-to-go-to-Nyack-Thing.



9. The Degrassi Every-Episode Marathon This weekend involved the moment I've been waiting two weeks/all my life for: Paige and Alex's lesbian love affair! Also it's pretty much the best show on television. I also enjoyed the 3,546 promo spots informing me that Shawn is coming back next season, which is awesome, 'cause he's smokin hot.


8. Sometimes we actually have the conversations you fantasize that we have.
The photograph below followed several glasses of wine, a breadbasket, assorted appetizers and the fruit I stole from the bar for Hav which the waiter informed me he did not "appreciate" (Yeah dude, DUH! Wanna know what I'd appreciate? The goddamn mixed greens I asked for or the bread you're clearly like, harvesting the grain for as we speak. Then I wouldn't have to be diggin' for orange slices like a soccer mom at halftime):

Topics of Discussion over aforementioned drink/snack/meal:
First Girl Crushed On
First Girl-Kiss
First Girl Fucked
Various drugs and their reported vs. actual effects on sexual activity
Why Lesbians do it in the Bathroom, and while we're on that topic, let's talk about all the times we've had sex in the bathroom.

7.This is what I'm dealing with, people.
This is a little photo collage of various messes from my room, circa ten minutes ago.


6."You Girls Look like Models!" "We are!"
Preparing for our future as Friends Forever with our own beautiful houses in the beautiful land outside of NYC who will be doing lots of photo shoots for Vanity Fair.


5. Turning boxes (most not so clearly labeled as this one) into a a bedroom.


4.Everyone in this place was eating lobster except these two monkeys.
A sunset, seafood, cabernet, and a discussion of things like how good it feels to be teased, tied up, spanked and burnt by talented lovers. See the photostrip I created with my superior photoshopping skills. We're just absurdly, ridiculously cool.

3. Shelter from the Storm?
There was a bit of a storm here on Saturday. I was moving/setting shit up, and, like most of my quests to "be budget," my hunt for plywood quickly resulted in a more expensive affair: paying two five-foot-tall men in raincoats to carry a boxspring and a bedframe (which I purchased while totally soaking wet all over everything) to my apartment and put it together. Outside, the tsunami raged and fresh undergrads in Harlumbia giggled and puddle hopped.

2. Cruisin' Together/The Waterfront Seating Hunt


1. I spent a shitload of time in line at Duane Reade, obviously. E.g. just now. I rewarded myself for the thirty-year wait with some Reese's Sticks, which were quite tasty and I enjoyed eating them as I was heckled on my way home in my SupaLova sweatpants (aka I bought them at Big Dee's on 14th street and cut them up).

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Aw, Nyack. Karen. Christina. Ris. All love, all fun. I hadn't factored in the amount of drrrrty discussion, like we were Britney, c. '01.

I'm SO HAPPY to be back in the city in the ugly, grey fall weather! whee.

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Matt Brand said...

top ten reasons not to do a top ten? This blog is getting very post modern!

riese said...

i heart post-modernism.

top one thing i forgot to mention:

THE STEAM SHOWER!!

Nothing said...

Degrassi and Duane Reade in one top 10 list? Eat your gap-toothed heart out Letterman!