The Rockford Peaches have nowhere to go from here but up, up, UP and away. As Carly pointed out, we scored twice as many points in the second half (8) than in the first (4), which's a two hundred percent improvement. At this rate, we'll be up to fighting numbers by the season's end.
Personally, I don't know exactly how to "shoot a basketball," and one of those bitches punched Alex in the face within 30 seconds of the game's commencement and made Alex bleed. Luckily for everyone, Alex isn't carrying any contagious diseases ... yet.
Why'd they punch Alex in the face? I don't know, but maybe 'cause Alex yelled: "I can't tell who I have, they all look the same!" after running onto the court. (JK, they didn't hear her say that. They hit her in the face 'cause other people suck.)
Me: "How do I talk about this game in my blog without sounding racist? I mean -- like -- "
Cait & Carly: "You can't."
Me: "So I should just go for it, like Lozo-style, just rush it all the way?"
You: "You have to."
Everyone We Know: "Yup."
The other team was all Asian girls. For those of you not from America, professional athletes still play in segregated leagues here, but instead of messing around within a sport, they just segregate the entire sport. You follow? Like white people got hockey, etc. Along with the Jews (my people), the Japanese (this was the actual ethnicity of our opponents) are traditionally not ballers and cannot smoke fools like you and me on the b-ball court. [Actually though, the Jews were good athletes in the early 20th century 'cause they lived in the ghetto, which is where you learn how to play basketball. Then they all became rich and had baybays and their baybabys grew up and now they run about in kitten heels on the teevee on reality shows about rich women and/or rich children who say mean things to the maid.] Anyhow when we saw the other team, we thought "Hey, maybe we have a chance."
Ok grasshoppers, this is what we call "stereotyping," which is wrong and unfair and evil, like assuming that all lesbians are psychos or that women are not as smart as men. What happens when you practice this type of behavior besides -- obviously -- ruining America and Freedom? You get your asses kicked by the Asian Invasion. I mean, pummeled. Just really beat. I didn't contribute much to one side or the other, as I discovered that running back and forth really takes the wind out of ya'. However, it wasn't really stereotyping, it was applying statistical knowledge to predict the outcome of a situation, like I [would've] learned [if I'd paid attention] in Science class. Whatevs, obvs the G-ds of basketball think otherwise.
Also, what we need is just one REALLY GOOD PLAYER. Like a sort of female Michael Jordan or even a female Chris Webber, or I mean seriously we'd take a female Larry Bird too. So if you fit that description and live in the NY area, we need you to come in, and do all the work while we trot behind you like disciples. Also Cait and Carly know how to play.
We need Sheryl Swoopes.
1. Junot on The Colbert Report:
2. Penguin's Feature with Junot Díaz
3. The Great American Pause: "When it comes to the novel, Americans are still willing to take it slow, or at least reward the writers who do ... Edward P Jones, Junot Díaz and Jeffrey Eugenides all took 11 years to write their Pulitzer prize-winning novels -a blink, really, when compared to Shirley Hazzard and Marilynne Robinson's 23-year gaps preceding The Great Fire and Gilead respectively." (@the guardian uk)
4. Novelist Junot Díaz Weaves Cultures and Languages (@PBS NewsHour)
5. Wao wins The Tournament of Books (@the morning news)
6. Into It : on what he's reading, listening to, and watching. (@cs monitor)
7. Chasing the Whale: A Profile of Junot Díaz (@poets & writers)
8. The National Book Critics Circle reviews Wao, (as a finalist in fiction). (@critical mass)
9 .Seven of Oh Seven: best book covers of 2008. Babypop, you win. (@fwis)
10. Slice's spotlight author - Junot Díaz. (@slice magazine)
11. An Interview with Junot Díaz @bookslut)
iii. quote me quote me quote me
I was writing about The New Fuck You last night so I started re-reading a lot of it. It's too precious to destroy with underlines. This is one thing I would underline though:
I agree to go. I don't have anything planned. I don't have anyone I have to see. At the very least, I guess, it won't be boring.
That’s why we do things, Julia and I. I like her about half the time.
We live together, so I have to see her. It’s easy that way. We’ve just discovered that our house is infested with mice, and it’s bringing us closer together.(from "What She Gives Up," by Anne Reid)
iv. Amanda Palmer with the Boston Pops
per the Atlantic article) or waste hours on pointless pursuits.
But sometimes ... it does. The other day, Alex linked me to a video of the Tonys performance of In the Heights -- amazing. (Also I think I've envisioned the narrator of Wao to look like Lin-Manuel Miranda) The "related to" column encouraged me to view prior Tony performances, like Spring Awakening and Cabaret and this year's RENT and as I sat in my gym clothes with work piled up all around me I somehow found myself twenty minutes deep into this videos-of-musicals downward spiral.
I think rock bottom hit when I was voluntarily re-watching a clip from "The View" in which Rosie brings on an 11-year-old girl who's got Cystic Fibrosis and loves musicals and then surprises her by bringing on the Broadway cast of RENT to sing "Seasons of Love" with her. What can I say, I totes heart rock bottom. Am I listening to "No Day But Today" right now? Maybe.