Monday, June 09, 2008

Auto-Fun of the Day :: 6-9-2008

Mom's going back to the midwest tonight, and then ... well. No. I'm remembering now a conversation from my prolific past of advice-giving (I'll bring this back around, I promise) with a friend who was having troubles with her significant other. "It's just really hard right now," she said. "We're both totally stressed out and overbooked and busy working [insert ridiculous amount] of hours, not sleeping, and with [insert additional health or job/apartment/family-related difficulty], we're just both on edge --" And I was like "But you've been saying that for years. It's always like that. You're going to have to stop waiting for things to go back to 'normal' to get better, because I think stressed out and overbooked is your 'normal.' This is where you're going to have to be working from when you're trying to make it work." Anyhow, I think they screamed at each other for another year or so before breaking up, I don't remember -- the point is: I was about to say, "and then I'll get back to a normal blogging schedule," but clearly there's actually no such thing. Also I don't now what happened to me that I started using "blog" as a verb, and like ... often. But next Sunday would be a primo opp for a Sunday Top Ten, and Stuff I've Been Reading is happening, and so is more advice columns (have you read our first one?!), and the Carly Vlog! OMG! What am I talking? I gotta get crackin'. Auto-fun is good for me though, it makes me read and stay aware of the webbernets world.

Oh um : Send us your questions. I know you have them, as well as feelings., 'cause if you didn't, you'd be Old Macdonald E-I-E-I-O. Today I found out that even though my Mom has a degree in Hamburgerology, she never finished McHamburger School for reals 'cause she got preggers w/me which makes me feel a bit guilty. I dashed her dreams and it would've been really fun on Take Your Daughter to Work Day if I could've had all those french fries. No worries, everything's coming up roses! I'm gonna be a writer, like Ann M. Martin.

quote:"No I can't write for you because I have promised myself I wouldn't take on any new writing deadlines for a year because I'm working on a self-assigned project and I don't want to continually be distracted from it. I am of course continually distracted from it enough as it is, it seems like I work on it less than everything else, in fact, very admittedly just-in-time if you will. The pieces I'm making continue the theme of "structures that fit my opening," a phrase that speaks quite directly to the question of necessary, of forms that fill entryways, needs, desires, etc. ... Maurizio Cattelan was once quoted as saying: 'If I didn't have any shows, and there wasn't any interest, I wouldn't do anything." Right now I don't want to write anything now, and yes, I sort of have, but this doesn't count, or does it?" (From "DEAR X" by Frances)

1)Peach Arse has got your book all ready: "You're Not the Only One - Charity Book for Warchild: "Ok, so it took three months, but rest assured it is three months of BRILLIANCE, of EXCELLENCE, of carefully chosen GORGEOUS bits of writing, of lovingly tendered editing and proofing, of gently nurtured and carefully catered for tastes and styles and with over ONE HUNDRED BLOGGERS' ENTRIES - woo hoooooooo!" (@peach)
2) Sad Doesn't Have to Mean Hungry: Elif Bautman is commissioned to dig up what all the sad young literary men eat to help her friend Carey, who's writing this article on the topic of Keith Gessen's chosen feedings from his novel All The Sad Young Literary Men. "Rice and Beans for Grad Students" has an answer. (@steam thing) (@muskegee phoneix)
3) How to organize or get rid of your book collection. (@the washington post)
4) A Grrl and Her Gun : On Valerie Solanis, author of the SCUM Manifesto, who shot Andy Warhol in 1968 -- ", her work has the rare virtue of seeming at the same time totally insane and totally right." (@the la tiimes)
5) Everyone has to go out and buy The New Yorker if they want to read the latest offering from my favorite author Mary Gaitskill. Here's the abstract. (@the new yorker)
6) It's summer! Time to buy shorts! SHORTS! The word "shorts" sounds like a quick and swiftly applied physical punishment. "Watch out or I'll short you!" etc. (@nymag)
7) Lesbian and Bisexual Women in Reality TV 2008. "For the first time ever, this week there are at least a dozen lesbian/bi women in prime tine TV reality shows. With the exception of Jackie Warner, all of the women on all of these shows appear to be drunk, almost drunk, wishing they were drunk, or pursuing a career in "promotions" or "theme bar waitressing." No judging, I've got no career and no likker. Just saying. I don't want our people to be just as retarded as their people. Is this democracy? (@afterellen)
8) Salon suggests summer reading, this week's category is memoir. (
9) I mentioned the butterfly effect on Friday. Now someone's written an article about "why pop culture loves the butterfly effect, and gets it totally wrong." : The Meaning of the Butterfly (
10) David Sedaris might occasionally exaggerate the truth for dramatic effect. Doesn't everyone? Since when have memoirists been held to higher standards than even our friends & family? Anyhow, he's funny: What You Read is What He is, Sort Of. (@nytimes)


Meghan said...

Verbing weirds language.

Also, I have an auto-fun for you for once. If you've already heard of it, please pretend you haven't. It's this. It seems kinda fun. Though the Guardian page seems to not have links to week 1 or something which is confusing me.

e. said...

Firstly, I don't have time to read them at this late hour (I am so tired, so bad at multitasking, which I have recently heard does not even exist, who knew?), but all your links today appear unanimously automatically fun! (By which I mean: interesting.) As soon as I have negative three seconds to rub together, I'll read them all, for reals, zero to minimal skimming.

Secondly, that picture is awesome, vaguely retro and super, super cute, it's just fantastic.

Also, because I am behind in my comments: nice advice column thingy, funny and smart, I especially liked your #3 suggestion to the first question. And props to a;ex for the accompanying graphic, it's stunning.

Dave Lozo said...

you look like you're being held hostage and are being told to smile by your captor. that, and the little kid from the Indian in the Cupboard.

eric mathew said...

Have you gotten David (Sedaris) new book yet. I really like the article in the times of him. And I always feel semi-weirded out when Amy is in stories because all I can picture is Candy.


p.s. if you didn't see one of the characters in my movie is named Riese. It was just a fun name and I couldn't resist. What is weirder is that a line you said in the now next videos is a line in the film, but this has been written for like two months.


eric mathew said...

by the that you in the picture? because if it is i am printin' it out and hangin' it on my wall. it is BEYOND fucking adorable. you could have been on sesame street.

for real for realz.

Peach said...

Snogs for the linkage XXX

a;ex said...

Thanks e. :)

riese said...

meghan - I heart Calvin & Hobbes. And thank you muchly for the personalized auto-fun. I heart all things Jeanette Winterson and fictional and serial and British and lovely.

e. - I hope they were as unanimously automatically fun as they seemed to seem! Skimming is the art of reading internet, I'm so good at it that I've stopped calling it "skimming" and just call it "reading."

I like my retro bowl cut in the photo, 'cause my hair looks almost exactly like that right now.

a;ex can stun a graphic for sure. And we're hoping our advice will continue to flow plentifully upon the people.

dave lozo - i think what you just described is a pretty accurate picture of my childhood . either one. i'll take the indian in the cupboard situation too.

eric mathew - i haven't. ... i haven't liked his later works as much, but that's probs 'cause i just LOVED naked SO much that I couldn't imagine he could possibly have anything better to say after that.

omg what is the line you must tell meee? what is the line?!

eric mathew again - oh that is SO me. I am like "hello! I know you think I am a girl because of my name and my anatomy, but what i am trying to tell you here through my haircut and my outfit is that i am NOT a girl! i am a boy! I am not a boy! I am a girlboygenderfuck! taDa!

peach - snogs for doin what you do that deserves serious linkage xxx

a;ex - hi, you're cute, i like your face, wanna wrestle?

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